Relationships, Sex and Love

What does it signify if a woman is not in relationship?

Well, the short answer is that it could mean almost anything, but what it may well mean is that the woman has several deep subconscious issues which are preventing her from entering into a sexual or romantic relationship.

In my experience it's almost inevitable that somebody who has psychological issues with the opposite sex, relating to wounds that they experienced in childhood, is going to find it very difficult to get into a full and open relationship with another adult later in life.

So one of things that is helpful in situations like this is that a person should obtain therapeutic assistance, or at the very least engage in a massive effort to improve their psychology by using a self-help program.

One of the best such programs that I have found - around getting into romantic relationships, I mean - is Capture His Heart And Make Him Love You Forever, which is a program written by Mike Fiore and Claire Casey, specifically designed to enable women who are struggling with the concept of relationship to turn their desires into reality. If you'd like to know more about this, click here to get all the information.

What is the difference between ejaculation and orgasm, and can one occur without the other?

Ejaculation and orgasm are two different body processes, and although it; is desirable that they should occur simultaneously, often they do not.

Semen can exude from a man's penis after a period of stimulation without his feeling anything in particular, and the experience of orgasm can be felt without any ejaculation - for instance, in preadolescence, after removal of the prostate gland, or when a man has made love so many times in succession that his reservoir of semen is exhausted.

When orgasm occurs without ejaculation in such circumstances there is nothing to be concerned about, but when ejaculation occurs without orgasm the person should advice from a doctor and sex therapist.

Indeed, if a man has trouble ejaculating, a condition known as delayed ejaculation, he may be too embarrassed to seek help from a doctor, in which case a home based delayed ejaculation treatment such as this one may help.

How often does the average woman experience orgasm?

Taking the Kinsey sample as an indication, one answer is that she experiences orgasm through intercourse six times out of ten when she is a young woman and nine times out of ten when she is older and more experienced.

The female orgasm, however, often occurs through the sexual stimulation that precedes or follows phallus-vagina contact.

If by "how often" is meant how many times a week, the Kinsey finding was that in married women the incidence of orgasm was 2.2 times per week at age 20 declining to 0.8 times per week at age 50; in unmarried women the average incidence remained about 0.5 times a week between the ages of 20 and 50.

The Hite Report suggests that of women who experienced orgasm and who masturbated, 96 percent experienced orgasm "regularly" during masturbation.

Is there anything wrong with having sexual intercourse while menstruating?

There is no medical reason to avoid intercourse while a woman is menstruating, but if she suffers severe period pains a woman will probably not desire sex at this time. Also, many couples find the blood produced unaesthetic, and prefer to wait until the period is over before resuming sexual activity. There are circum- stances, however, in which other considerations may override this - for instance, if a couple is reunited after a long time.

In fact, the flow of menstrual blood tends to slow down during intercourse, though an in- crease in the flow may occur afterward.

A diaphragm may be used to hold back the flow, and if this is the woman's normal method of contraception she should continue to use it, for although it is unlikely for a woman to become pregnant during her period, it is not impossible.

How can a woman who has never had an orgasm learn how to do so?

One way is for her to enlist the aid of a sexually knowledgeable, sensitive, and understanding man, but perhaps the best method to learn how to give a woman an orgasm is to use a program such as this one.

At first it may take up to 45 minutes of clitoral stimulation to trigger the reflex, but a woman can soon learn to speed up the escalation. Breathing exercises can help: breathe deeply and exhale completely, making sure that there is no muscular tension in the pelvis, buttocks, or groin at the end of the exhalation. Practice building tension with the intake of breath and completely relaxing it with the exhalation.

Another exercise that helps the orgasm reflex is to practice contracting and relaxing the vaginal muscles. Sexual fantasizing can help, too. Don't forget that what makes human sex special is the creative power of the human imagination.

As the philosopher Ortega y Gasset wrote in his essay On Love: "Nine-tenths of that which is attributed to sexuality is the work of our magnificent ability to imagine."

What differences between male and female sexual response should a woman be aware of when making love?

Many women still feel inhibited about taking an active part in lovemaking, but the stereotype of the male-dominant, female-submissive type of sex does not usually afford either party the maximum satisfaction. For both, the triggering of the orgasm reflex depends on a complete surrender, so each must provide the other with something to which to surrender.

As arousal escalates in the man, sensation becomes genitally focused, and continued and varied genital stimulation carries him toward his climax.

Although a man can reach orgasm within two to five minutes, generally a woman takes much longer, and she should make him aware of her own rate of arousal so that he does not reach his climax too soon and leave her unsatisfied. It is essential to the success of an erotyic relationship that both partners help each other to attain full orgasmic satisfaction and that neither settles for less.

However, such sexual satisfaction is predicated on the assumption that a man will be able to control his ejaculation sufficiently well for him to be able to withstand the excitement of entering his partner, thrusting into her vagina, and enjoying all the sensations which go with it while remaining below the threshold of his point of ejaculatory inevitability.

This can be challenging, not least because men who have premature ejaculation tend to be rather anxious when they are in a sexual situation, and the anxiety itself increases their level of sexual arousal. However, with care, treatment for premature ejaculation is available.

Should you wish to tackle the problem, you can find out all about control of premature ejaculation here.


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Updated January 10, 2021